Nearing Living…

29 August 2011


Feelings that I cannot shed
No evicting from my head
Continuously to you lying
Hiding that I’m slowly dying
Nearing living but soon dead

I so desperately want to say
Just how I feel everyday
But holding tongue upon reflection
Knowing certainly rejection
And nothing good would come my way

A thousand deaths a day to know
Life assailed by this familiar foe
Your words innocent but testing
Cannot help my heart arresting
And for me there is no place to go

Feelings that I cannot shed
No evicting from my head
Inside sad, in silence crying
Hiding that I’m slowly dying
Nearing living but soon dead

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4 Responses to “Nearing Living…”

  1. Are you really sure you can’t just talk to her? Tell her how you feel. Wouldn’t that help you? Regardless of what her response is… *big hugs*

    • Pervagus said

      Yep absolutely sure I can’t. I know she doesn’t feel the same way, and deep down she knows how I feel, but for the sake of our friendship we just jointly deny it. She can’t help how she feels, as much as I can’t help how I do. Talking about it genuinely would only force us apart, and that, I cannot conscience, not until she finds someone to care for her and make her happy, or someone whisks me away. Until then, I’ll share her worries, listen to her stories about the men she dates, likes and more, and I’ll still do the DIY too.

      Thanks for the advice, which my head totally agrees with, but against my own better judgement, my heart wins out and pumps cauliflower cheese in my ears. *hugs back*

  2. This is so sad. I hope you find a way to communicate your feelings. A well written poem, great flow. Take care *hugs*

    • Pervagus said

      Thanks reading and commenting Norma. No need to communicate my feelings really. We both know it, without having to express it in words, but thank heavens she doesn’t know about my blog in any case 😉

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